Ant Invasion

Tuesday 15 March 2011

Ant Invasion

"How can you be so insensitive" she said and I froze holding the bucket of water in my hand thinking maybe the thorough analysis I made before the wedding wasn't as complete as I thought. "what's the problem now?" I asked "didn't you ask me to destroy the ant-nest?!". She looked at me without hiding her disappointment and said "you have no heart! For three days now we have been watching the images from the tsunami in

Japan

and you couldn't find a more humane way to get rid of the ants?!". After a moment of silence I reacted with "o.k., so where does it put me now? Before Charles Manson on the list?". "You don't have to be so sarcastic all the time! You could've just used the ant-repellant!". "Ant-repellant?!" I answered with hidden satisfaction "how can you be so insensitive?! You know my grandfather was a survivor of Auschwitz!". She looked at me for a few seconds and then turned her back and left for the kitchen. Oh well I thought. I hope I have enough porn to get through the next few weeks…

On the music side of things... yesterday i have been informed that my "Black Box" album has been chosen as album of the year by "Rolling Stone Magazine"!!! I was so excited to hear the news that i fell off the bed and woke up. On the other hand (as i mentioned on my last post), I have been chosen by Jay Adkins the presenter of the N.U.A. show on OFF THE CHARTS RADIO -UK to be the weekly artist played in the "Masterpieces - one album played in full" which is very flattering and appreciated.
I've also added to this blog a new gadget with links to "BLACK BOX" album reviews (on the bottom right corner).
For the Israeli crowd, you can now purchase the "Black Box" in the following stores:
"Disk Center", Dizengoff ctr., Tel Aviv
"Ktzat Aheret". Pinsker 41, Tel Aviv
"Pikolo", Naharia
"Daf Halak", Kiryat Shmone
"Musroom" pub (home base)
and also in the excellent I LOVE MUSIC internet store.

Apart from that, next week i will clear the fog regarding the issue with the social workers/family violence rumor (i will supply you with a video with all the evidence). BTW, for those who don't know me, I'd like to remind that this Pink Box is the sarcastic left side of my brain and you should always take it in suspicious manner. If you or anyone might be offended by anything written here, you should BOO HOO yourself, then call yourself a CRY BABY, then slap yourself for being too sensitive and if all that doesn't help, contact me and i'll have it removed (after i send a few people to embarrass you at your workplace).

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About PINK BOX blog

Wednesday night March 9, 2011. While returning home half-sober from the weekly Jam session I was confronted by three men with baseball bats and a very "cute" Rottweiler. Although I am a master in Kong-Foo-Chicken-Dancing (a martial art form I developed over the years which paralyzes the opponent by uncontrollable laughter) and also having a black belt by one of the world's most known cheap designers, I reached out for my wallet and offered the three men all my money. "We don't want yer money!" the short guy shouted at me and before I could realize, the two big men where holding my arms behind my back. "What do you want?" I urged and the short guy came as close as he can to my face. Although short, I could still smell his breath and I remember thinking if I should offer him a tic-tak I had in my pocket. "What do we want?! You're asking?!, ah?... you have such a pretty face, wouldn't it be a shame to decorate it with a nice and long scar?!". After a moment of silence I finally realized what's going on "for gods sake! you've really gone far this time! all I wanted was to cancel my daily newspaper subscription , no need for violence, I'll renew it first thing in the morning!". The short guy looked at me as if I have just fallen from the sky with a pink feather parachute and a banana costume but after a short moment of silence he opened his tortilla-breath mouth again "we are the Facebook Gang and we have been informed that you are refusing to open your facebook account?!". His tone was getting even lower than his height but I wasn't intending to easily brake "Look guys, I don't want to offend you but this facebook thing is not for me, I'm sorry, I can't do it! I'm too old fashion". "O.k., so you want it the hard way, eh…?" he said while pinching my left nipple. "I'll tell you what we'll do… " he said "we can compromise on a Twitter account, but that's just 'cuz you seem a nice guy, what do you say, we have a deal?". "Look" I explained while I felt my nipple slowly changing colors "can't we compromise on starting some blog or something like that?". The short guy looked surprised, he took out his cell-phone (I-pod 7th generation, model PD68) and mumbled "give me a minute" he moved away a couple of meters though I could still hear glimpses of the conversation, something about "The blue pigeon will not fly, should I bring it for a face-lift?" or something similar. I couldn't really figure it out but after a minute or so he came back and said "o.k., a blog it is! but we'll be watching you, if your blog isn't on-air by tomorrow night, you can start rubbing anesthetic cream on your right nipple!". "O.k., O.k. don't worry, I will not risk 35 years of a beautiful relationship with my nipples!". The three men left and I could see their figures fading in the distance… only then I realized… I don't even know what a blog is!
Listen to BLACK BOX